On a scale of one to ten, Valentine's Day would probably come in at ten for being one of the most stressful days, especially for men.

Preparing the perfect surprise and finding the best gift the burden is usually heavily carried by men. We've heard countless stories of couples who met at university and have been in love ever since.

But what we rarely hear about is how they navigated the expectations around gift giving and celebrating significant milestones in their relationship.

For students who aren't financially stable, Valentine's Day can take a serious toll - not only on their wallets, but also on their emotional well-being.

Jesse Ngeywa believes that Valentine's Day has become more about transactions than emotions, especially with the influence of social media.

"Valentine's Day has become a test of how much you can give. Even I feel the pressure to buy my partner a gift, whether I can afford it or not. As cliché as it sounds, love can't be bought or exchanged like a pair of jeans that don't fit, but these days it's changed, and it certainly can. And you certainly can't get a refund for a broken heart," he says.

Male students in particular, he says, feel immense pressure, as many lack the financial means to meet these expectations.

Ngeywa recalls a time when he took out a Sh5,000 loan just to pull off a Valentine's Day surprise.

"I only had Sh5,000, but the surprise I had planned cost Sh10,000. So I borrowed the rest. I wanted to take her to a new restaurant for lunch, hire someone to play a song for her and buy her a gift," he says.

While the surprise was a success and his partner enjoyed the day, he later regretted the financial burden it left him with.

Kaiser Magangi echoes this sentiment, highlighting how Valentine's Day often pushes male students into debt in an attempt to please their partners.

"Some students even use their school fees to meet their partner's expectations and avoid separation," he says.

To avoid such financial strain, Magangi has made it a priority to communicate openly with his partner about what he can and cannot afford.

"I plan ahead by saving and taking part-time jobs. This year, I've saved to take her out to dinner and buy her a present," he says.

On the other hand, Yvonne Ruto admits that women generally don't feel the same pressure because they are traditionally on the receiving end of gifts.

"The stress of Valentine's Day is mostly on men, but if you love someone, you should know how to give them a gift," she says.

She too puts money aside to buy her partner thoughtful gifts such as shoes, shirts and socks.

Yvonne also highlights how social media adds to the pressure, making Valentine's Day feel more like a competition.

"Many people push their partners to outdo each other in gift giving just for bragging rights, especially on campus," she says.

If expectations aren't met, she notes, many relationships don't survive past 14 February.

Love on a budget: How university students navigate Valentine's Day

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Muthoni Wanjiku